Script Review: [HorribleSubs] Upotte!! – 01

One of the worst shows of all time if not the worst. Where have I heard that before? Oh, maybe there’s something about terrible loli fanservice.

This show isn’t about actual guns… or is it?

r/a/ge level: 2/100. There’s not much to hate when this particular Crunchyroll translator does nearly everything a weeaboo could ask for. The only heinous act of localization would be changing “Ojou-san” to “comes from a rich family.” Truly, truly horrible.

Honorifics (including -sensei and sensei), Eastern/spoken name order (I think), and no translation for the opening or ending. Sasuga Crunchyroll!

\an8 at its finest. You can’t really do much with typesetting when compatibility is a problem, but I still wanted to show an example of how Crunchyroll does things.

These writers have a terrible sense of humor. There’s absolutely nothing funny about this exchange. This is the kind of joke that would appeal to a five-year-old. “Hey, kid, don’t you hate broccoli?” “Oh boy, do I!” I want to strangle whoever wrote this joke. This show needs some new writers.

“Where’s the fun in growing inedible flowers/plants?” or “What’s the point in growing inedible flowers/plants?”

“Fun of” isn’t valid English. The German teacher is likely well-educated and speaks Japanese (in the show) perfectly. It shouldn’t be difficult to argue that perhaps the translation should reflect that. In this case, it’s more likely Crunchyroll figured the dialogue is super easy, so they should just have one of the less-skilled translators have a go at it. Or maybe the translator’s actually really good but doesn’t care about this show. I can’t really tell.

“Well, that’s what a flowerbed is.”

Super hard, I know. The original line is a nonsensical response to their teacher’s question. Depending on the preferred line I choose from the last screenshot, this could still kind of sucks, but it at least addresses why they’re growing inedible flowers because that’s what flowerbeds are typically comprised of. It’s different from a vegetable garden.

“She’s a regular Hitler.”

Okay, that might be in bad taste.

“I’ll win it for you” or “Just leave it to me.”

Only the most seasoned weeaboos would argue for this line. It should be changed because “This [whatever] will …” isn’t normal sentence structure. No one would ever say something like this, so it’s incredibly awkward to read. I’m indifferent toward honorifics or leaving in Japanese words when it comes to grading, unless it actually affects the flow or quality of a line, which it does in this case. The downside to localizing or ignoring the “Onee-chan” part is losing some meaning, but it’s a fair tradeoff for better subs.

“His stance/posture is perfect…”

“Ideal” by itself is awkward. “Perfect,” a synonym, works much better in its place. This is just one of those things English speakers should be able to pick up on. If I read this line to one of my friends, they might not know what exactly what’s off about the line, but they’d definitely feel something amiss. The girl who’s thinking this is being fairly analytical in this scene, so the argument that she could make the mistake of mixing ideal and perfectly aren’t well substantiated.

“So what’s the school like? Seishou Academy, that is.”

The teacher is appending Seishou Academy to the end of his question to be more specific, so adding “that is” only seems natural. It makes the line flow much better than having Seishou Academy just trail off on it’s own where it could easily be confused for another sentence or incorrect characterization of the new teacher.

“… Thank you, sir.”

Yes, the new teacher actually says “Principal,” but that doesn’t have to be in the subs. It’s weird because no one calls the principal of a school “Principal” directly. Realistically, the character would say the principal’s name, but the viewer isn’t supposed to know his name yet for whatever reason, so he should call his superior “sir” or something. It’s not the ideal case, but whatever. Better than what Crunchyroll had.

And now that I’m looking at the line more, the first sentence is also pretty stupid. Although, I guess it’s more for the viewer. You’d think the principal already knows when his new employees are starting.

She’s from the past! “You’re the one I met two days ago” would eliminate that silly interpretation.

I’m glad this show’s creators have their priorities straight. Middle school lolis are the ones who are exploited for superfluous fanservice, whereas the high schoolers totally normal, nothing out of the ordinary girls. Makes total sense.

This is probably the only thing I’ve liked about the episode so far—the thing about high school girls having normal body proportions and wearing realistic skirts, not the middle school loli fanservice shit. They probably get more screen time later, but I’m not sticking around to verify that.

Are these girls actually anthropomorphic guns or what? Also, more fanservice.

“So this is her.”

The repetition with two thats makes the line awkward to read. Any capable editor should notice these things while reading through the script. Too many repeating words or phrases are likely to be noticed by the viewer, which isn’t good. Subs should be unobtrusive.

My thoughts exactly, new guy.

It’s almost over!

The first line makes no sense. “She doesn’t know when to give up”? I think she’s referring to the front FNC always puts up. The line would be better phrased as “She doesn’t know when to just give in,” as in give in to her feelings.

Cool typo, Crunchyroll.

What I liked:

This is about average quality for a fansub but really subpar for Crunchyroll.

+ Understandable

What I didn’t like:

Crunchyroll really needs to invest in a professional editor or just hire more competent translators. You can really tell when they leave a show in the hands of a newbie.

– Terrible phrasing at times

– Fuck this show

Overall Grade: You have 3 lolis! … out of five.

This entry was posted by brainchild.

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