Script Review: [Mazui] Hyouka – 01v2

This isn’t Sindalf’s v2, sadly. And Dark_Sage, it was pointless in waiting.

I want to go into energy conservation mode, too.

r/a/ge level: 80/100. Mazui is shit. Deal with it, nerds.

Honorifics present. Eastern/Spoken name order. Romaji and English lyrics for the opening.

And I know I never look through a script with Aegisub, but Mazui really isn’t worth my time. I’m sure there are so many things wrong that I might as well do it this way.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:06.25,0:00:09.20,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,When you think “high school life”, the word “rose-colored” comes to mind.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:09.20,0:00:11.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And when you think “rose-colored”, “high school life” comes to mind.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:12.18,0:00:18.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It’s natural to think that way, since society \Nexpects high school life to be rose-colored.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:18.49,0:00:25.25,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Nevertheless, I don’t think that all high school students desire a rose-colored life.

Kill yourself if you think this color analogy is appropriate. You have failed as a translator if you do shit like this and try to justify your stupidity. It is simply pants-on-head retarded. The word “rose-colored” means something in English, and it is most commonly associated with the idiom “rose-colored glasses.” Thus, 99.9% of English speakers (not just hurrdurr Americans) will misinterpret the line.

You see, the point of a translation is to get the meaning and intention of the line across to the viewer. In this case, high school is supposed to be considered the prime of one’s life or the high point, like Commie said. Sure, Commie ignored the color metaphor, but that metaphor only works in the Japanese. It means something completely different in English when compared to its Japanese counterpart. Thus, you must change it to prevent misinterpretation, either to Commie’s version or something like “colorful.” Deliberately misleading the audience when that is the intent of the original language would be the only case it is okay to do things like this.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:25.25,0:00:32.22,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Surely there must be people who aren’t interested in studying, sports, or romance.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:34.10,0:00:38.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Surely there must be students who want a “gray” life, so to speak.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:38.85,0:00:43.52,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Though, I would call that a pretty sad way to live.

The color metaphor continues here, and it is still stupid as fuck. A translator might say, “Oh, but it might be important later!” Hurrdurr. Then you change the subs to fit when you get to that oh-so-important point. I guarantee you that there will not be an untranslatable line in this shitty anime, anyway. If an incompetent translator or editor has trouble with the color metaphor later, just give me the script, and I’ll handle it.

To reiterate, unless it’s the show’s intention (and it really isn’t in this case), there’s literally no justification to confuse your viewers within the first 40 seconds of the show. There’s also a reason I call my reviews “script reviews” and not “editing reviews.”

Dialogue: 6,0:00:43.85,0:00:47.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn’t know you had such self-hatred.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:47.15,0:00:48.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Self-hatred?

“Self-hatred” is better than “inferiority complex,” but it’s still pretty terrible.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:48.85,0:00:52.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,One who’s against studying, sports, and romance.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:52.17,0:00:53.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Always gray.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:53.95,0:00:56.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Doesn’t that describe you, Houtarou?

Dialogue: 6,0:00:56.34,0:00:58.59,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It’s not like I’m against those.

Dialogue: 6,0:00:58.59,0:00:59.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Maybe from your perspective.

I’m having a hard time seeing what Mazui has changed. This is still massive shit.

Dialogue: 6,0:01:00.23,0:01:03.39,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,”Conserving energy” is what \Nyou would be, Houtarou.

“You’re all about energy conservation, huh?”

Or, “You’re the epitome of energy conservation, Houtarou.”

It was a nice attempt at change, but no, you still fail, Mazui. The original is not English.

Dialogue: 6,0:01:04.28,0:01:06.08,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,To you, doing anything is simply tedious,

Dialogue: 6,0:01:06.08,0:01:09.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and you have no interest in anything that seems like it would waste energy.

Dialogue: 6,0:01:09.12,0:01:11.09,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,And your motto is:

Dialogue: 6,0:01:12.95,0:01:15.66,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If I don’t have to do it, I won’t.

Dialogue: 6,0:01:15.66,0:01:18.17,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,If I do have to do it, make it quick.

I’m sure not everything is tedious to Houtarou. It’s more like he doesn’t like doing things he doesn’t have to. Had Mazui actually used a line that accurately reflected that, maybe the first two lines would’ve better led into his motto. This is why having any English speaker whatsoever on the team is really helpful. If he cared about the group’s release quality, maybe he would bring up why certain lines sound off to him.

Dialogue: 6,0:01:21.37,0:01:24.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Considering the huge variety of clubs that Kamiyama High School has,

Dialogue: 6,0:01:24.54,0:01:28.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,to not belong to any of them makes you the very definition of gray.

“Considering how many clubs Kamiyama High School has, / you’re the odd one out for not finding club that fits your interests.”

Mazui has changed a couple things so far… I think. Of course, they don’t change things where they matter. Houtarou is not the “very definition of gray,” whatever that means. The second clause doesn’t relate to the first one at all either. You don’t even have to be that good at English to realize how stupid these lines are.

Dialogue: 6,0:07:48.12,0:07:51.72,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Which means that I was locked in?

“That” is redundant and reduces the flow of the line. The little things count, you know. I wouldn’t expect the staff of one of the more incompetent groups to know that, though.

Dialogue: 6,0:08:08.87,0:08:11.24,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I didn’t mean to listen in or anything.

Dialogue: 6,0:08:11.24,0:08:12.15,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You totally did.

I’ll at least point out this positive change Mazui did. I’m so proud of them.

Dialogue: 6,0:09:12.28,0:09:14.01,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The Juumonji family of Arekusu Shrine,

Dialogue: 6,0:09:14.01,0:09:15.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the bookstore owners, the Sarusuberi family,

Dialogue: 6,0:09:15.31,0:09:16.56,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,the farmowners, the Chitanda family,

Dialogue: 6,0:09:16.56,0:09:19.05,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and the Manninbashi family that owns the mountainside.

Although the lines are separated visually, the commas can still create some confusion. This is where I would actually be okay with semicolons or maybe changing the sentence structure to eliminate the extra commas. This has been a problem in every release, so whatever.

Dialogue: 6,0:09:19.46,0:09:21.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The numbers in their names increase by powers of ten as you go down the list,

Dialogue: 6,0:09:21.90,0:09:24.34,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,so they’re called the four “rising powers”.

Yay, they included an explanation for the nickname! I am proud, Mazui.

Dialogue: 6,0:09:24.34,0:09:25.54,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Is that true?

Dialogue: 6,0:09:25.54,0:09:30.49,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I don’t know about being distinguished, but this is the first time I’ve heard that title.

“But” presents a contrast, which isn’t readily apparent from the original phrasing of the line. Those two clauses pretty much mean the same thing. She doesn’t think her family is famous, so Mazui should’ve used “and” or just reworded the sentence.

Dialogue: 6,0:09:30.49,0:09:31.82,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,You made that up, didn’t you.

Something so obvious was pointed out to them, but they just don’t care, huh? Also, that’s how you use “but,” Mazui.

Dialogue: 6,0:09:46.10,0:09:50.70,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,She’s held the top scores in the prefecture in mock exams since middle school, so I’ve seen her name a lot.

“Her mock exam scores were among the top in the prefecture, so I’ve seen her name around.”

Oh look, another unfixed problem from their first release. This line makes it sound like the mock exam scores are analogous to the high score in an arcade game. You just “hold the high score” until someone comes around and knocks you off the leader boards. However, that probably isn’t the case when exams are constantly changing. Once you’re on top for that exam, you’re on top forever, or it really wouldn’t be a fair judge of knowledge.

Dialogue: 6,0:13:15.40,0:13:16.31,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,It’s pretty old.

Dialogue: 6,0:13:16.31,0:13:16.95,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Yes.

Nonsensical response. As expected of Mazui.

Dialogue: 6,0:14:19.10,0:14:21.47,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Houtarou definitely isn’t cut out for that kind of job.

Dialogue: 6,0:14:21.50,0:14:23.50,Alternative,,0000,0000,0000,,{\an8}He isn’t?

Dialogue: 6,0:14:23.80,0:14:27.00,Alternative,,0000,0000,0000,,{\an8}I thought that Oreki-san was ideal.{Oreki-san seemed like the perfect choice.}

Dialogue: 6,0:14:27.00,0:14:29.26,Alternative,,0000,0000,0000,,{\an8}Chitanda-san, you’re under the wrong impression.{Chitanda-san, you’ve got the wrong impression of him.}

Dialogue: 6,0:14:29.89,0:14:34.08,Alternative,,0000,0000,0000,,{\an8}Houtarou here is absolutely dedicated to a life of energy conservation.

Dialogue: 6,0:14:34.08,0:14:36.89,Alternative,,0000,0000,0000,,{\an8}Not the save-the-planet kind, but the save-me-the-trouble kind.

Dialogue: 6,0:14:36.91,0:14:41.40,Alternative,,0000,0000,0000,,{\an8}But he seems very smart and clear-headed.{But he seems very smart and sharp.}

My changes are commented with “{“ and “}.” I liked “Not the save-the-planet kind, but the save-me-the-trouble kind,” but the rest was horrid, awkward, and just wrong. There’s a difference between “literal translation” and being plain stupid, though I don’t expect many anime viewers (what with being incredibly stupid themselves and all) to understand. The average viewer will continue watching shitsubs or downloading whatever comes first. If Commie manages to consistently release first, maybe a fair number of viewers will be spared from gg and Mazui’s shitsubs, but I don’t care. I say, let the idiots suffer their delusions.

Dialogue: 6,0:16:15.35,0:16:18.90,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Everyone in 1-A was talking about it at lunchtime today.

Dialogue: 6,0:17:20.18,0:17:22.00,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,About that! At lunchtime{\fscx300}-

Lunchtime is what a kindergartener would say. How about “during lunch”?

Dialogue: 6,0:17:27.61,0:17:29.60,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Satoshi, mind telling her?

Dialogue: 6,0:17:31.47,0:17:35.23,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Then allow me to tell you the story of the secret club.

“Okay, then. I’ll tell you the story of the secret club.”

The second line has Fukube completely ignoring the Houtarou’s buildup. I wouldn’t expect incompetent translators to understand these things, though. Remember: You are only as good as your weakest link.

Dialogue: 6,0:17:40.21,0:17:46.41,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,Kamiyama High has a lot of clubs, so of course, there are a lot of recruitment posters.

Dialogue: 6,0:17:46.41,0:17:49.85,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,The billboards around campus are filled with them.’s definition of “billboard”

Google Images results for “billboard”

Yeah. You’re retarded, Mazui. 8thSin, be sure to document this under “HUGE FUCKING ERROR THAT WOULDN’T EXIST IF MAZUI HAD ACCESS TO A DICTIONARY OR GOOGLE.”

I think they meant “bulletin board.”

Dialogue: 6,0:19:21.55,0:19:23.55,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,There are 30 billboards in total on campus.

Hah. Their school must be gigantic.

Dialogue: 6,0:22:51.65,0:22:55.87,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I wanted to go straight to the entrance, turning my homework in at the staff room on the way,

Dialogue: 6,0:22:55.87,0:22:57.98,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,and then go straight home.

Parallel structure, please. Yes, even normal people maintain parallel structure when talking casually. It just feels more natural that way.

Dialogue: 6,0:24:49.24,0:24:50.71,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,We would have seen that if we’d gone there.

Let’s just use one contraction but not the most obvious one!

Dialogue: 6,0:24:59.48,0:25:04.12,Default,,0000,0000,0000,,I get the feeling that going to the music room may have conserved more energy in the long run.

I’ll try to end this on a somewhat good note. Mazui decided to nix all uses of “power” except for the rising powers reference, which is a good thing, considering how incorrectly it was used earlier.

What I liked:

Slightly better than their original release, but there’s not much to like in this release other than it was understandable if I just put a little effort into ignoring all the stupid fuckups. The best change would be explaining the meaning behind the “rising powers” nickname.

+ Not as shitty as before, but still pretty shitty

+ Explained “rising powers” at least

What I didn’t like:

Mazui still has shit dialogue. None of the characters are distinguishable from generic J-to-E translations, borderline Google TL. If I hadn’t seen this episode four times now, I wouldn’t be able to tell that these guys are smarter than your average high schooler and kind of talk differently from time to time. There is absolutely no reason to watch Mazui’s shitty releases of Hyouka unless you’re an idiotic Mazui fan boy.

With gg and Mazui’s many, many awkward lines and generally shitty scripts, I have to recommend Commie for Hyouka if you actually care about the characters and mysteries. In before “OMG Commie bias.” It’s more likely that most anime viewers don’t care. They’ll just stick to whatever shitty group they like the most.

– Terrible dialogue

– Mistakes everywhere

– Misuse of many words

– Easily misinterpreted

– Use more contractions, please

– Not Sindalf’s script

Overall Grade: 2 versions and they still suck… out of 5. Go die, Mazui. At least until Oreimo season two comes out.

This entry was posted by brainchild.

8 thoughts on “Script Review: [Mazui] Hyouka – 01v2

  1. »The word “rose-colored” means something in English, and it is most commonly associated with the idiom “rose-colored glasses.” Thus, 99.9% of English speakers (not just hurrdurr Americans) will misinterpret the line.«

    Calling bullshit on this. I don’t know anyone who watched the show and thought purely about rose-colored glasses apart from Commie staff. Oreki even explains what he means. Don’t try to justificate dumbing the script down only because you want to be as liberal as possible.

    • Dude you’re not even a native English speaker so I don’t see how you can make that kind of judgment.

      It’s clear just from reading the online discussions on the subject that a lot of people did indeed interpret it that way.

    • >I don’t know anyone who watched the show and thought purely about rose-colored glasses apart from Commie staff.
      I don’t know if you know this, but not everyone who gets called out on /a/ for being a “Commie dev” actually works for Commie. Shocking, I know.

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